CHARLIZE Theron is back in The Old Guard 2, a sequel to the 2020 Netflix action film, and those of you who enjoyed the first one won’t be disappointed.
However, you should probably question your life choices, as The Old Guard was so bloody awful you have to scratch your head and wonder why they would make another one?
But then if dull and unimaginative are your thing, who am I to judge.
Two films in and this Highlander-lite franchise already feels like it has had the backside torn off it. The first film, again starring the Atomic Blonde star, and directed by Gina Prince Bythewood, was pure soulless. Unfortunately, director Victoria Mahoney hasn’t faired any better with this tortuous mess.
There was never enough of a storyline to begin with to capture our imaginations, and our merry band of immortal mercenaries, thanks to contrived fight scenes, awkward screenplay, and inane dialogue, never really stood a chance from the off.
For those of you lucky enough not to have seen the first film, The Old Guard are a group of undying warriors who’ve secretly protected humanity for centuries.
Based on comics by Greg Rucka, we pick up the story here with Andy (Theron) coming face to face with two of her biggest adversaries after she has lost her immortality.
Her former comrade Quynh (Veronica Ngô), who has been left abandoned for 500 years in a watery grave is back seeking revenge, while the villainess Discord (Uma Thurman), the very first of the immortals, pulls her strings.
The Old Guard 2 is joyless from beginning to end, as was its predecessor. Theron is the best thing about this half-baked and galumphing action film, but she looks mortified for the most part, and rightly so.
For a film about immortal warriors, it doesn’t half suck the life out of you!
(2/5)
